This Article is from a video by Dr. Sadaqat Ali, titled:
‘To solve a Problem should we Create another Problem?’
Whenever conflicts arise between human beings, they are usually not resolved in one meeting. It requires at least five and at most twenty-one meetings. We should try not to create another problem if we have a problem. But usually it is that the servant thinks that he will create a problem only then that problem will be solved. And then the second problem becomes the ‘real problem’, that is, the problem of the nature, and the original issue becomes problem number 2.
And it comes to the point that we do not act boldly and do not talk. We are already partially tired and we cannot invite further moods. The other useful thing we forget about is feeling. That is, the problem we discharge in a very angry way, then we must discharge it in a loving environment. As a logical problem that we cannot disconnect lovingly, then we should not discharge it with anger.
Humans should come to talk. You have to speak, it does not mean that you can communicate. People in the world are in high esteem, then you will see one thing in them that they have to communicate well. Humans also volunteer to solve problems. But we need to adopt the influence of the dominant personality, ‘Win Won’.
Win-win ‘habit is that I win and you win too.
The ‘win-lose’ is that I win and you lose and you continue to suffer in your mind.
‘Loose-win’ is where I say good-bye I lose ‘.
Of all these, one has always been a complete and best practitioner with no harm to anyone.
A very important question everyone must ask himself is is it necessary to raise another problem to solve one problem?
The answer, apparently, is ‘not at all’ but we prove it logically.
Whenever there are conflicts between humans, they can be negotiated and resolved, because they can communicate. And whenever there is a dispute between family members, it is best to resolve it on the same day or else the complication increases, or at least one sleep after the other and try to have a meeting 45 minutes. Because if the problem is not resolved after 45 minutes, then leave it for the next meeting because it will not be resolved that day, but may worsen further.
The fluctuation of relationships between human beings is seen, and sometimes there is no reason why relationships are bad. But human beings get tired of being constantly together, and small boats come together to dispel the conflict. Because the thing that man enjoys and if that thing continues to unite, it starts to get boring. For example, if a person likes to eat mutton and starts eating mutton daily, he or she will start to feel offended.
If children take care of their parents‘ wishes and respect them, then problems will never get worse. Likewise, if spouses respect each other and care for each other’s wishes, life can be quite peaceful and conflict will be less. But on the contrary, in the centuries old, things were scarce, and riots were more likely to lead to who would get it.
Sometimes we have a mind that if we make a push to solve a problem, it will be solved, like if we give a sit down to solve a problem, it will be solved. When you talk about going to Begum Mache, solving problems by hunger strike, threatening to leave the house, it also means solving the problem, and sometimes there are ways to solve the problem. But the results do not turn out to be any good. Since the human mind is very interesting and very fast, solving the problem is very important. Now solutions can also be extracted directly – that is, inventions such as extraction without creating a problem, then they are ‘solved’ and they are extracted directly. Some people solve the problem in a backward manner that creates a problem for which to solve the problem, as in ancient times when the princess asked for something from her father, she would fall into the ‘matter of fact’. Sleeping on a broken couch, or quitting eating, just like today’s babies do when they wake up and won’t eat a half-day meal, lock themselves up in the room, have such a tired feeling on the face. Will come and listen to someone’s grief and become more restless.
If you ever have a tragedy that strikes you at ‘gunpoint‘ then you will be very upset then no matter what your position, you are worried for the first 40 days. And you have to struggle to get out of this grief. It’s not because you had a lot of money in your purse or because your mobile was too expensive, but also because whenever a bully takes the same thing from you, your heart breaks and you find yourself. Do not think safe.
In life, problems and conflicts keep coming, and we need to be well-prepared so that they are easy to deal with. As we get stronger neurologically, improve stress management and adopt habits that are influential personality habits.
1. We should start preparing everything so that there is no chaos in time.
2. Before starting any work, we should think about the result so that we can get an idea of where this work will take us.
3. We need to have a set of everything in life and try to do the important and important things first.
4. We must keep thinking in which we also win and benefit others.
5. Seek first to understand and then understand it.
6. Synchronize with the people around you to have a good life.
7. Keep updating your skills life-wise.
When the problem arises, the solution should not go to any other than a conversation, because human beings have the ability to communicate, which is very important to recognize.
Written by Hafsa Shahid (Clinical Psychologist)
Thoughts: Dr. Sadaqat Ali