Following are the strategies through which a co-dependent person can lead his own life at its fullest.
These are as follows:
- Setting the emotional boundaries
- Stop being reactive
- Take your own time and set yourself free
- Get out of the victim role
- Being independent
- Get your own track
- Love your self
- Learn how to accept
- Feel the feelings
- Manage your Anger
- Believe, you can think
- Set your own goals
Asma Qureshi is working with Willing Ways as a Clinical Psychologist.She has done Masters in Applied Psychology from the University ofPunjab in 2006.After this, she did six months internship at Psychiatry ward of Sir Ganga Ram Hospital, Lahore. She did her Post MagisterialDiploma in Clinical Psychology (PMDCP) from the Institute of Clinical psychology, University of Karachi in 2009.
Editor: Asma Qureshi
SETTING THE EMOTIONAL BOUNDARIES
It is basically getting detached from the pain of being involved in all matters of the sufferer and making oneself free from the agony of handling of all the issues of him. It further means that one should learn that every person is responsible for his or her actions and the co-dependent is not a sole responsible person to resolve all the matters going on in his life. Moreover, it let the person to focus on present moment living—living in the here and now. Above all, it requires the faith in the GOD, and setting one’s boundaries as a human being with limited resources. It promotes the real well being and nourishes the real relationship.
Rewards of setting the boundaries:
- Deep sense of peace
- The ability to give and receive love in self enhancing, energizing ways
- The freedom to find real solutions to our problems
- The freedom to live our lives without excessive feelings of guilt about or responsibility toward others.
- It makes others free to solve their own problems on their own.
When we should set the boundaries?
- When we can’t stop thinking, talking about or worrying about someone or something.
- When our emotions are churning and boiling.
- When we feel that we have to do something about someone because we can’t stand it another minute.
- When we believe we can no longer live with the problem we have been trying to live with.