LEARN HOW TO ACCEPT THE TRUTH

Co dependents never know what to expect and when to expect, particularly when we are in a close relationship with an alcoholic, drug addict or any person with some uncontrollable behaviors. We are bombarded with responsibilities. Living in fantasy and having wishful thinking would never fix the problems. We need to face the reality and then accept it gracefully if we want to move in our lives. Living in a codependent relationship leads to denial. We tend to ignore the painful reality by being in the denial which further sabotages the quality of our own lives.

In order to bring the functionality of our own lives, we need to go through the denial management and grief recovery.

Greif recovery has the following stages:

  • Denial
  • Anger
  • Bargaining
  • Depression
  • Acceptance

FEEL THE FEELINGS

Co dependents are emotionally charged people. In any emotional expression they cross the limits. Many a times they tend to ignore their own genuine feelings and don’t let them be expressed.

Being co dependents what we need to do for our feelings?

  • Your feelings are important. They count and they matter.
  • Your feelings are also indicators.
  • Feelings can be positive motivators too.
  • Your feelings can also provide you with clues to your desires, wants and ambitions.
  • Repressing the true feelings can lead to headaches and other bodily aches and pains.
  • Feelings are energy.
  • It’s not bad to speak up about the true feelings.

MANAGE YOUR ANGER

Following suggestions would work to manage the anger:

  • Address the myths related to anger.
  • Feel the emotion.
  • Acknowledge the thoughts that accompany the feeling.
  • Examine the thinking that goes with the feeling of anger.
  • Make a responsible decision about what, if any, action you need to take.
  • Don’t let anger control you.
  • Openly and honestly discuss your anger, when it’s appropriate.
  • Take responsibility for your anger
  • Talk to people you trust.
  • Burn off the anger energy
  • Don’t beat yourselves or others for feeling angry.
  • Deal with the guilt before or after the anger.

BELIEVE, YOU CAN THINK

Believing in oneself and thinking would matter a lot in your recovery from codependency. Following suggestions would help us greatly.

  • Treat your minds to some peace.
  • Ask God to help you think.
  • Quit abusing your minds.
  • Feed your minds with healthy thoughts.
  • Stretch your minds.
  • Quit saying bad things about your minds.

SET YOUR OWN GOALS

Living the life with set goals is an essential part of your life.

Through following strategies you can make it sure:

  • Turn everything into a goal.
  • Omit the shoulds.
  • Don’t limit yourself.
  • Write goals on paper.
  • Commit written goal to God.
  • Let go.
  • Do what you can, one day at a time.
  • Set goals regularly and as needed.
  • Check off the goals we reach.
  • Be patient.
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