Lack of Emotional Connection:
The fourth reason why people marry the wrong person is that you don’t have a deep emotional connection with the person. So how do you know if you have a connection with a person in a deeper emotional way? Here are four questions you can ask yourself to evaluate whether you have this connection in a deeper way with a person…
Do I respect and admire this person? (Respect and admiration are the fundamental emotional connection that we have with another person.)
The second one is Do I trust this person and do I rely on him/her?
Third question is… Do I feel emotionally safe with this person?
And the last one is Do I feel calm and at peace with this person?
That will also help you to get down to evaluating the deeper level of the emotional connection. So when you ask these four questions, you must get answers and if the answer is “I don’t know, I’m not sure, etc.” then you have to keep evaluating until you know for sure and truly understand how you feel about him/her. If you don’t feel safe now, you won’t feel safe when you are married. If you don’t trust now, this won’t change when you are married!
Avoid Pre-Marital Sex:
Intimacy before the commitment of marriage can be a big hurdle in judging the right person for marriage. When you’ve been involved with someone sexually before marriage, it tends to make it more difficult to start thinking about these more important issues. It difficult for people to face these issues because once they’ve made this level of commitment, they’re afraid to bring up issues. Be intellectually committed before you become emotionally committed or sexually committed.
Always Consider your Family & Friends Remarks of your Choice:
We don’t always see eye to eye with our friends and family about our choice of partner, but if there’s a general consensus amongst them that this person is really wrong for you, take a moment to stop and think. Your friends and family know you well, and care about your happiness, so they may be seeing something that your head-over-heels feelings have blinded you to. They may be wrong, but it’s worth listening to their opinions all the same.
Lack of Openness:
People usually make one common mistake when they meet before marriage they don’t discuss all of their concerns about each other. So they must talk about anything and everything that bothers them. Asking questions and discussing questions that allow each of you to be more vulnerable with each other. And three qualities, communication, negotiation and working together are absolutely necessary for success in marital life.
You’re Responsible for your own Happiness:
It’s very important to remember that no other human being is responsible for our own happiness. Many people make this common mistake of thinking that someone else will fulfill their needs and make their life better and that’s their reason for getting married. This is an important principle that no one is responsible for our happiness. Only we are responsible for our own happiness. So it is very important if you’re not happy with yourself then you have to take the responsibility for your own hands and deal with it.
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