Using family and loved ones:
Making you feel guilty about children; using visitation to harass you; threatening to take the children away.
Treating you like a servant; making all big decisions; performing like the ‘master of the castle’; being the one to define roles in the relationship.
Using economic abuse:
Making you ask for money; giving you an allowance; taking your money; not letting you know about or have access to family income.
Negotiation and fairness:
Seeking mutually satisfying resolutions to conflict; accepting change; being willing to compromise.
Talking and acting so that you feel safe and comfortable expressing yourself and doing things.
Listening to you non-judgmentally; being emotionally affirming and understanding; valuing opinions.
Trust and support:
Supporting your goals in life; respecting your right to your own feelings, friends, activities and opinions.
Honesty and accountability:
Accepting responsibility for self; acknowledging past use of violence; admitting being wrong; communicating openly and trustfully.
Mutually agreeing on a fair distribution of work; making family decisions together.
Making money decisions together; making sure both partners benefit from financial arrangements.