If you have the plummeting feeling that your relationship is on the shaky grounds, then it’s time to focus on your relationship and try to salvage it. To save it, you’re going to need to work together as a team to find out the problem or multiple problems you’re experiencing, and also solution to those problems. You’re also going to need some work at loving and reconnecting with each other once again to what you felt in the past.
Salma Basharat has completed her MSC in Behavioral Sciences from Fatima Jinnah Women University After completing BSC in Botany, Zoology and Psychology. She did her 6 weeks internship in psychiatric ward of Benazir Bhutto hospital. Her areas of interest are mainly relationship counseling and addiction counseling. She is working with indoor as well as outdoor patients simultaneously with the aim of making difference in someone`s life and committed to the well being and restoration of her clients.
Editor: Samreen Masaud
These days, we consider that people are redeemable. Very quickly we get to the result, “she’s no good, I’ll dump her and find someone else.” And more rapidly are we to find a new devotee who exhibits the exact same — if not bad — inclination as the one we just left. We are trained to be self-sufficient, and this is an unbelievable discipline; we are self-made and self-sustainable. But taken to the farthest, this attitude will surely affect our relationships. People can’t be exchanged for anyone else. Your partner has a special place in your life for a greater reason with perfect timing. He or she is a human being packed with faults and weaknesses, but also flourishing with potential veracity. Be careful of dumping someone just because they need a tad of internal repair effort. You do, too. This does not mean that you should ever reconcile for an unhealthy situation, but a successful relationship involves honest work and the result can be amazingly rewarding in terms of not just finding, but retaining, long-term love.
If your main goal is to protect yourself in the relationship from disappointment and anger, you aren’t open to change. On the other hand, you’ll most likely want to control your spouse to implement that protection, making your relationship unhealthy and dormant. If you’re both willing to learn and grow together, your relationship can build up over time into something way better. If only one of you is willing to work, it may not work.
If you presently find yourself in a relationship that’s frail, wrecked, or on the edge of breaking up, but that you believe earns your effort, it’s not the time to give up.
Think about these ways to save your stressed relationship:
If you have reached at a decisive stage, you can most likely figure out when things started degrading, even just a little bit. Think about when the issues started, so you can draw an outline how to advance the conversation with your partner. You May easily identify one main reason, such as you or your loved one was disloyal, and that changed the nature of the relationship.
Further, you may not be able to locate one main reason, but rather, a chain of reasons for why things aren’t working out for you. Many little things can start to add up in that list. For example, maybe he’s or she’s spending too much time with his acquaintances, or you never take out time for each other. On the other hand, maybe you’re both having pressure at work. Perhaps you’re becoming mismatched. If you’ve been together for a long time, it’s likely that you’ve grown poles apart over the course of the relationship.
If you’re hesitant where to begin with, consider taking a relationship quiz that can help you evaluate how well your relationship is.